chibirhm: (Another day in the Bartlett White House.)
Ugh, time to kill until work. I should be writing this short essay that I've been working on that actually has some promise, except I'm too bored to write. Have I mentioned Too Bored To Write feeling before? BECAUSE IT IS THE WORST AND I HATE IT. SO! I am now going to share with you the mishmash of links I have acquired, and you're going to entertain me in my comments section, and you will enjoy it, goddamn.

Excellent spam! Includes pretty dresses, memes, and a kitten and a puppy in love with each other. )
chibirhm: (Care a hell of a lot for that armor.)


THINGS WE SHOULD FOCUS ON INSTEAD OF MY APPARENT INABILITY TO UPDATE MY LIVEJOURNAL: OOH, COLIN MORGAN. OOOOOOH. I've told you guys about my deep and abiding obsession I have with Colin's profile, right, and how I believe that it is the most perfect profile in the universe, from which all perfect profiles are thus derived? In case I haven't, those are my feelings. OOH COLIN MORGAN. I WOULD FEEL SWOONY AND FAINT AROUND YOU, BUT THAT WOULD MAKE YOU DEEPLY UNCOMFORTABLE.

Guys, I wish I had, like, a legitimate and good reason why I can't seem to post a lot lately. I wish I had a secret project or was a secret government agent. I wish I had gotten a new puppy/unicorn/whatever. The truth is I've been busy with really boring stuff. Like yesterday I had a meeting in Harvard Square in the morning and then I napped the afternoon away because I'm not used to having to be conscious in the morning. The day before that, I was busy shoveling two feet of snow. And then there have been a bunch of days where it's like wrote an article! Spent all day making phone calls! I've been posting on tumblr a lot because you don't really have to say anything on tumblr and it's v. v. convenient. Tumblr is also a place where it is not only socially acceptable but encouraged to blather for roughly one paragraph about eighteen times a day and no one is like kasjflkjdsfl STOP SPAMMING ME. So here are some things that, were it socially acceptable on Livejournal to spam you with four-sentence updates, I would have one so, as illustrated by .gifs:

LONG WORDY LIST GOES HERE. )
chibirhm: (It's two tickets to that thing you love!)
After much twatwaffling, I can now say officially, HEY, FRIENDS WHOSE ADDRESSES I STOLE, I PROMISE IT WAS NOT FOR NEFARIOUS REASONS. I REALLY AM SENDING YOU STUFF FOR THE HOLIDAYS. BEHOLD!



Look! That's me! With the cards! Let's ignore the fact that I look, like, five years old! Instead, let us discuss how the nice woman helping me was named Gimme, which is like the coolest name ever, no joke.

Anyway, I'm bored, which is a sadly common occurrence around the holidays because shows stop airing, which, wtf, I am not okay with this. Like, it's a Monday and there's no new Hawaii 5-0? WHAT IS EVEN THE POINT OF IT BEING A MONDAY?

So while I'm bored and staring at my Kono-centric Steve/Danny fic pretending I'm writing it, you should go over and write something for the SCREW YOU, CANON! FEST for Merlin. Also, tell me about your lives! How are you? What are you doing? PLEASE AT LEAST PRETEND YOU HAVE INTERESTING LIVES FOR MY SAKE.
chibirhm: (JGL is my future husband)
So I know I said I was going to have my ~ultimate both parts of the finale~ Merlin recap on Wednesday. AND I MEANT FOR THAT TO BE TRUE. But then on Thursday I was busy because I had a doctor's appointment and work, which I didn't finish. And then I was like "oh, well, I'll finish the column Friday morning!", except I forgot something: lately I've been sleeping like shit. I can't get my brain to turn off until like for or five in the morning, at which point it will ONLY shut off and I will fall asleep if I leave my laptop on and playing a television show. (Most weirdly specific insomnia ever?!) And then my alarm goes off at ten every morning - partially so I don't sleep the day away, but mostly because I've found if I don't take my medications by ten than the ADD stuff will keep me awake. Irony! But I've talked to my mom and consulted various doctors before about how to fall asleep easier at night, since it's always been a problem, and everything I've looked up says you need to set a schedule for yourself, including what time you wake up. Which I do! It just doesn't seem to be working.

The point is, I'm operating on very, very little sleep and the column took me the entire day to write. It was actually sort of traumatic and involved tears because I was so frustrated and really insanely overtired (I think in the past three days I've gotten maybe 15 hours of sleep?) Which is actually ironic, because the article was on the latest episode of Bones where Brennan also, like, doesn't sleep. LIFE, ART, BLAH BLAH BLAH. The point is, I'll get to it. Eventually. I'm not exactly worried, though, because is there ever going to be a point where you all are like "no, I really don't feel like getting excited over Merlin and Arthur's big gay love"??? I THINK NOT.

ANYWAY A FEW THINGS THAT ARE DELIGHTFUL TO TIDE YOU OVER:

Involves pictures, cut to save your friendslist. )

CINCO
This is important enough to leave outside of a cut, so - I am not doing the Holiday Love Meme. I'm just... not a fan of love memes. They make me feel increasingly awkward. If you want to leave me some love, you are welcome to do it in this entry or really, at any time of the year without having even the slightest patina of an excuse. If you were really looking forward to what I was going to write about you or for any reason feel your holiday season would be improved by me verbally validating our totally awesome e-bond, please consider this my open invitation to request just such a thing without being judged even the teeniest of tiny bits.

SIES
...and now I'm going to take a nap like a motherfucking boss.
chibirhm: (Care a hell of a lot for that armor.)
Dear Mean Meme,

You are reaching dangerous levels of Not Cool, Man. First, you discussed something my friend said in flock out of flock, which is just... wow. And that's not even the first time you've done that! Even if these people weren't my friends, douche move. And now, you are acting totally drunk off the power of "revealing" that Georgia and Bradley are dating. Really, Mean Meme? I will admit that yes, I initially freaked out. However, you forget, I think, that people are capable of going back to check facts. Remember how that rumor came out initially and it was ridiculed BEFORE the pictures showed up? Remember why? Because there were tweets saying Bradley was in LA at the fucking time the picture was supposed to be taken, and you know who I'm going to believe? Someone on Twitter. Who actually puts their name on the stuff they write. As opposed to an obscure anon fandom cesspool. So unless Bradley has somehow managed to break the space-time continuum, that picture proves nothing other than Bradley and Georgia were seen in public together, and that the source is a liar. Wooo! Shocking!

Meme, you are part of my life in the same way the weather forecast is part of my life. I watch you because I feel it more prudent to see what's coming than to stick my head in the sand. It is time that you took a good, hard look at yourself and realized that, much like the weather forecast, you are wrong, like, 90% of the time.

Sincerely,
Me

And now, for something much more exciting, TIME FOR MERLIN THOUGHTS.

THAT TIME ON MERLIN WHERE BRADLEY AND COLIN MADE FACES AND I WENT !!!!!!!!ASLKJFLSKDJFKSDLJF!!!!!!! )

Edit: Somewhere, there is a fourteen year old version of me having a joy seizure over this.

Edit 2: I ran out of my ADD meds and was totally spaced out, so instead of taking me a few hours, this recap took me the entire ding-dong day. I also took, like, five accidental naps today. CURSE YOU ARTIFICIALLY CREATED ENERGY I HAVE GROWN USED TO. During that time Hawaii 5-0 was on and WHAT THE WHAT IS THIS SHOW. Okay, to recap, Within the first ten minutes Steve first looks like rough trade by wearing a nearly see-through wifebeater, then he strips and shamelessly objectifies himself (while they cut to Danny VERY CLEARLY OGLING HIM AHAHAHHAHA WHAT IS THIS) while Kono (who isn't exactly bad-looking) demurely puts on a diving vest to cover up her bikini in the background. And then! After that! Danny calls Steve "babe". As in, he literally turns to Steve and says "There are cleaning people for that, babe" in front of another team member. Between this and all the rampant positive portrayal of minorities, I am now 99% sure this show is all a figment of my imagination. It actually exists in a magical world of rainbows and unicorns and I am thinking about what I want to see and subconsciously projecting it onto my television. I expect Danny and Steve to be making out by the season finale, show.

Also, what is the proper protocol when one is writing a fic that gets disproved by canon? Because I was writing a Steve makes terrible excuses to crash on Danny's couch which leads to sex fic, but now we know Steve's staying in his bullet-riddled house. Honestly, it's Steve, so I should have suspected that, but I stupidly figure that, like most cop shows, Hawaii 5-0 would forget that episodes don't happen in a vacuum. TELL ME WHAT TO DO, OH FRIENDSLIST.
chibirhm: (Time for the reckoning.)
Do you ever get in one of those moods where you wake up and you're all GRR ARG DO ALL THE THINGS and then you do, except your brain is still hopping on crazy adrenaline like WHAT ELSE WHAT ELSE WHAT ELSE?!?! WE NEED TO DO ALL THE THINGS!!!! Because that is my brain today, and by god, its annoying. Like, chill, self, I responded to three e-mails, renewed my prescription, made two doctor's appointments, helped my mom clean the bathroom, and posted an article for work. All I need to do is watch Modern Family and Cougar Town (not exactly strenuous) and do the dishes.

Welcome to my brain. 95% of the time it's a lazy bastard, but that 5% of the time where it's not, it's a total bitch.

In more exciting news, I'm writing again! As in, fic, and not for work! Hooray! Though it will probably disappoint most of you to know that it's Hawaii 5-0 fic. Look, I'm sorry, dudes, but I haven't been able to write since Big Bang. Like, I think my brain was suffering from writing PTSD. Because LJ entries and blog posts were totally fine, but the second I opened a google doc or any form of word processor, my brain would shut down completely. And so then I thought, maybe I am burnt out on the fic for this fandom, if not the squee. So after regular Merlin I tried Merlin RPS. Nothing. Inception/Merlin crossover AU? Nothing. Inception? Nothing. Sherlock? Nothing. So at this point, I'd be excited to write fucking Smurf fanfiction, I don't even give a fuck. Also, these are the guys I'm writing about:



Okay, that is not fan-made video, that is official promotional material. I'm pretty sure when life hands you that kind of gay on a silver platter it is your prerogative - nay, your duty - to write crazy fanfiction all up in this bitch. Right now I'm not sure of the quality of my writing - it feels sort of chopped-up and lumpy. It's a lot of really great dialogue with not a lot of anything else. As in, like, descriptors. Or an actual plot. But the dialogue is so super snappy, you guys.

Also, I'm fighting really hard with myself to not name this story "How Danny Williams Got Lei'd" because 1. that's the most horrible, overused pun in the history of time and 2. That's totally not what the story is even about, but how has no one in the Hawaii 5-0 fandom used that joke yet? I'm not sure who I'm more ashamed of, myself, or everyone else.

ANYWAY, I'm boring, you don't care, here are three links for you to peruse:

ONE!
I'm normally not that much of a fan of Hyperbole and a Half. Like, it's fun, but I don't see the big deal - maybe because it was so over-hyped to me. But I still follow it because, well, fun. ANYWAY, pretty much all of her entries are meh and cute, but yesterday she wrote an entry about how her dogs reacted to her moving that almost made me pee my pants laughing so hard. Like, I was crying. Seriously. I was reading this entry last night while my parents and sister were having a Serious and Upsetting Grown-Up Conversation (About Serious and Upsetting Things) in the kitchen, and I was half-listening because I wanted to know what was going on but didn't want to actually get involved. And I knew I couldn't laugh to hard out loud because, well, the mood of the house was very solemn, but OH MY GOD THIS ARTICLE. So I ended up sitting there making these choking sobby noises, and eventually my mom was like "...Julia, are you okay? Are you.... crying?!?!" and I was like "NO!" except I sort of sounded like I was crying because I couldn't really speak. Also, I Was crying, it was just from laughter.

I don't know what it is about when she writes about her dogs, but I want her to write about them ALL THE TIME because when she wrote about the canine intelligence test? Also completely lost it. I'm not sure why I find this so funny. Maybe it has to do with having worked in a dog daycare so I can look at that ridiculous behavior and go "OH MY GOD IT'S SO TRUE AHAHHHAHAHAH DOGS". WHAT RIDICULOUS ANIMALS.

TWO!
Not for the faint of heart, but there are new stills of Colin in Parked and OH MY GOD, COLIN MORGAN. YOU ARE SO STUPIDLY BEAUTIFUL AND HEARTBREAKING. HOW DO YOU MAKE ME CRY IN THE AWESOMEST POSSIBLE WAY?!!?!?

THREE!
Because I think Bradley James secretly has a psychic connection to my brain, this is the (very late) quest:



HE AND COLIN DISCUSS THEIR BODIES. BY WHICH HE MEANS, SWAPPING THEM. AS IN, HE AND COLIN WRITE BODYSWAP FIC IN THEIR SPARE TIME. AHAHAHAHAHA WHO ARE YOU BOYS, SERIOUSLY. ALSO, SOMEONE PLEASE PUT BRADLEY JAMES ON THE WRITING TEAM OF MERLIN, STAT. HE CLEARLY HAS THE BEST IDEAS.

EDIT: OH GREAT FRIENDSLIST, does anyone know how to code? I want to change my LJ layout very slightly - tweak it so it has a background image, widen the area the entries are in, change the colors, that sort of thing - but don't know enough about CSS to do so. If you can do so, please let me know, and I'll make out with you. A lot.
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