chibirhm: (I'm not good with messes.)
ONE!
So I knew vaguely there was racefail stuff going on in Inception fandom but I was avoiding it because I hate racefail. HATE IT. Last year's hubbub turned me off of people trying to out politically correct each other. I'm trying to refrain from a race rant because hello, wank, no one needs more of it. A lot has been said and really, it's been over a week. No fuel needs to be added to the fire. I'm just going to say these few things, which are my reactions to most racefail and which I feel are still relevant/important:

One, authors are not their characters. I'm not taking sides when I say this on the actual wank being discussed, I'm just saying this as an author who has had this mistake made about their work, and it's always been a pet peeve. My characters are not me. They do not represent my point of view. They do not do what I would do. They don't have to be perfect people, because real people aren't perfect. Real people make racist comments, or sexist comments, or dumb comments. If I want to write a character who tells his wife to go back to the kitchen where she belongs, this doesn't mean I think women should all go back to the kitchen, or that he necessarily has to be a villain to say that. (Even though I like to be in the kitchen. Actually, is it my day to do dishes? Fuck.) I don't like the idea that I, as an author, should have to warn for that, or put a little asterisk/footnote saying "BY THE WAY THIS IS NOT MY POINT OF VIEW". Shouldn't that be self-evident? My neighbors, all of them, are extremely nice people. But most of them are hardcore, Fox News-watching, homophobic, and semi-racist as well. Life isn't that cut and dry, and fiction shouldn't have to be either.

I'm saying this regardless of what was said in the fic that got people in a hubbub because it was supposedly racist, appropriate or not. I didn't actually read the fic (though I did read the passage people complained about). I don't actually care what was said and who said what. That is not the point. The point is, from an author's point of view, can I just complain about this phenomenon in general? If I write a character who has a nervous tic, no one assumes I have that nervous tic. If I write a character who's alcoholic, people don't assume I'm alcoholic. (I hope.) Sometimes I need to write a character saying something despicable, and so I don't see why someone should then assume that nothing else relates to my actual point of view, but that comment does.

The fact of the matter is, sometimes people say offensive things in real life, no matter how good-intentioned they are. I know I have. I'm not saying it's GOOD it happens, but the feeling that you have to make your characters perfectly eloquent, PC, walking advertisements for The Right Way To Handle Situations, and sparkling bastions of humanity is, from an author's point of view, extremely hampering. And irritating. And generally, bad.

Two, The fandom corner of the internet is, in general, an extremely accepting place. When racefail does erupt, it's usually over something pretty small. I care about -isms. I care a lot about social justice. In an ideal world, perhaps these are things we should nitpick over but really? This is, no matter how you look at it, nitpicking. There are big freaking instances of -isms out in the world. Like, here is some racism I posted about yesterday. And here is some really heinous homophobia. (By the way, I don't believe in hell, but I absolutely believe that when this guy dies, he will be burning in it.)

Fandom is a large place that can make a lot of change and do a lot of good and raise a lot of awareness. If we're going to do that, why are we wasting time on internet fights over interrogating texts from the wrong perspective or getting into fights that boil down to "you're more internally racist and have more privilege!" "no, you're more internally racist and have more privilege!"?

I would love to live in a world where a throwaway potentially racist line in a piece of fanfiction is, in fact, the worst thing that happens in the big, wide world of -isms and intolerance. But we do not live in that world, and for that reason, this entire thing is fucking ridiculous.

If fandom would like to discuss the problems that are legitimately problematic in the world today, I will be there marching in the parade and cheering on the forces of progressiveness and acceptance and spreading the word loud and far. But if fandom is continue getting into silly slapfights, I'm going to continue to roll my eyes and ignore fandom when it comes to race and discussing and wanking about it, because seriously? Seriously? There are a limited number of hours in a day, and the number of hours I'm willing to budget out for being annoyed is even more limited. At some point, in order to remain relatively sane and healthy, you need to make a threshold of things that get you all foaming at the mouth, because the world is so full of irritating things that if you were actually irritated by everything that maybe deserved to get upset over, you would not have time to sleep. I like sleep. I like being sane. I like being happy. If I'm going to be asked to get upset, I'd prefer it was over something that was, you know, actually a big problem that effects a lot of the world at large as opposed to, say, a hundred people on the internet.

But that's just me.


A lot of less heavy and unimportant stuff about Project Runway, Taylor Swift, Fox News, fic recs, otters, Merlin, Glee, dogs, pumpkin carving, rallies, and Bones DVDs. In that order. )

Man, I should... start looking into posting shorter entries more often. The problem is that I can go, like, a week and a half with nothing to say, and then all at once I have about TEN BILLION THINGS TO GET OUT. Like right now. I'm sorry. I just have so many ~thoughts and feelings~.
chibirhm: (Care a hell of a lot for that armor.)
You know what's really tiring and irksome? When people complain about you on the internet/use something you said to start an internet fight/hatefest, only instead of actually saying "what you said/did bothered me", they just... go do it somewhere else instead of addressing the problem to you. It is doubly worse if you don't know the person or have never actually spoken to them in your life, and then wham! There they are! Complaining!

I'm used to this happening on the Mean Meme, because that is what the Mean Meme exists for. Mostly, when they do it, it amuses me more than anything else. But this week it happened on some articles I wrote, and on some people's livejournals, and it's really getting old. I could understand if I was some sort of big deal, people would go complain elsewhere instead of saying "yo, what you're doing is whack". Like, if someone wrote a nationally syndicated column or made a post on a Big Deal Blog like Gawker or something in which they said something douchey, I wouldn't leave a comment there because would never read it/care. But seriously, me? I now fall in the "it's not worth leaving a comment" category? People can't talk to me? I talk about gay dudes and write fake come-ons by Thomas Aquinas and blabber about my gerbil. I am an extremely un-influential, super-boring person. I am not a big deal at all. I'm a very little deal. I'm still not sure when I even entered into deal-dom.

Sigh. Instead of discussing this, let's discuss two people who aren't tiring/irksome and are actually a big deal. At least, to me:



I LOVE EVERYTHING ABOUT THEIR FACES. HOW DO THEY MANAGE TO BE MORE DELIGHTFUL EVERY WEEK? I love all the gratuitous Colin's Profile Porn we get (I have this thing for Colin's profile. Namely: it is the most freakishly beautiful profile to ever exist ever. I feel it should be exploited and used more often. Or perhaps put on a coin, since that's where the profile of awesome people goes.), I love how cute and giggly they are with each other (and that Colin's response to Bradley going "I'll give you a hint - RAAAAAAAR" was not "a dying crow?" because that would have been my guess), and I continue to be enamored with the fact that there is a very special smile Colin uses on Bradley that he doesn't use with anyone else. At one point, I should probably go around gathering actual proof so I sound less like a crazy person, but there's this smile, I swear, okay. He only smiles part-way, so just the tops of his top teeth are showing, and his eyes don't go into full-on crinkle mode, but do jusssst at the edges and it's so fond I can't stand it. I SWEAR I AM NOT CRAZY AND THIS EXISTS, OKAY. I have asked for confirmation from people who don't even ship these two and they've gone HOLY SHIT YOU ARE RIGHT. It's entirely possible they were humoring me, but it totally is there! I'm not kidding! STOP LOOKING AT ME LIKE THAT OKAY.

But regardless, I LOVE THEIR FACES AND THEIR BFF-NESS (SLASH POSSIBLY MORE) AND EVERYTHING THEY CHOOSE TO BE. THE END.

ALSO I HAVE SOME THOUGHTS ON THIS WEEK'S MERLIN. )

Edit: This entry was supposed to go up late this afternoon, but my homework ended up taking way longer than it was supposed to, and on top of that, the gerbil had a stroke.

Gerbils are generally pretty healthy, hardy little creatures, but once they get older, they are prone to having strokes. As Tess is nearly three, she's quite elderly for a gerbil. She'd been oddly sleepy all day (especially considering that she was manic this weekend - jumping for eight hours straight and refusing to be calmed), but I figured she was just making up for being crazy for the last few days. I started to worry around eight-ish, and when I went to touch her to wake her, she was ice cold and shaking uncontrollably. And when she uncurled and tried to walk away, she could barely coordinate her paws, and ended up bumbling and swaying around the cage, knocking into the sides. (Actually, if she was perfectly fine otherwise, I would have assumed she was drunk, and it would have been kind of cute.) I immediately picked her up and started bawling, which made my dad, who was the only one home with me, feel very awkward and uncomfortable, since he's always been of the opinion that it's weird to keep a rodent in the house and feed it on purpose, and shouldn't he go release it at the park for the owls to eat like he does with the mice in our basement? After I collected myself, I immediately swaddled the gerbil up in an old flannel sheet and looked up the symptoms. And let's just say, it's a good thing I checked in on her when I did.

Just like when humans have strokes, not all gerbil strokes are created equal. When a gerbil has a stroke, one of four things can happen:

1. It kills the gerbil immediately.
2. The gerbil becomes paralyzed/incapacitated and has to be put down for humane reasons.
3. The gerbil suffers subsequent strokes and, after being already compromised, dies.
4. The gerbil has a rough patch and eventually is fine.

After calling around to the vet (yes, she has a vet, she had conjunctivitis when she was little, which got so bad mostly because I felt like an idiot getting a vet for a gerbil. I relented when I started having to open her eyes for her and wipe out the pink goop at least once a day), and then the veterinary hospital (the vet was closed), and then the breeder (because the hospital said I should bring her in for diagnostics and bloodwork, and all I could think was "she just had a stroke, you want me to give her a heart attack by stressing her out that much? Also, she's a gerbil"), a few things became clear. One, the gerbil, in all likelihood, was going to be okay. Normally the strokes come in rapid succession, and the more hours she went without one the better. Two, the hospital would be useless. They could tell me exactly what type of stroke she had, but there isn't any medicine they could give her to make her better. Because, even though I act like she's not, she's a gerbil, it's not like gerbil neurological conditions are a lucrative market. Three, she had warmed up considerably, was very vocal when she didn't like how I had wrapped her, and ate a banana slice like she was starving and then gulped down a ton of water, all of which were signs of a healthy, recovering little beastie, before napping under the blanket I keep over my lap, curled up like a doormouse. She'll have to be watched closely for the next couple of days, and at night I'll be moving the cage up to my room, because it's warmer and there's a lamp I can put on her to keep her warm. But she's up and about and running around like almost-normal (she still occasionally wobbles).

So it's looking like, in conclusion, Little Miss Thang will be back to her sassy-ass self in no time. (She has already sassed me at least twice tonight.) I am extremely grateful to everyone who saw my frantic OMGWTF MY GERBIL HAD A STROKE BRB HAVING AN EMOTIONAL MELTDOWN tweet and responded so kindly, and to everyone who e-mailed me, and to all the love sent my way. On behalf of both myself and Her Majesty The Most Over-Loved Rodent in the Universe, thank you. We might have been able to do this without you, but it sure would have sucked a whole lot more.

chibirhm: (Once and Future King)


HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MONSIEUR BRADLEY JAMES. You are a generally delightful human being and I am exceedingly pleased that your parents decided to have sex, and that the result of that combined in such a lovely expression of DNA. I also hope you are celebrating by having a lot of spectacular sex with your boyfriend, and then as a birthday present to the internet/my pants, you decide to release pictures or youtube videos or something.

AHEM. ANYWAY. Today is boring. I'm attempting to get my reading for class done, but it's St. Thomas Aquinas and MY GOD HE IS THE MOST BORING MAN ALIVE. JFC. I'm 99% sure he became a priest not because he felt some divine calling, but rather because he could not get laid. Like, if Thomas Aquinas was trying to pick you up, he'd do it in the following manner:

FIRST ARTICLE
WHETHER WE SHOULD JOINTLY ACHIEVE ORGASM

We proceed thus to the first article:-

Objection 1: It would seem that as I am an attractive, slightly inebriated individual, you, too, are an attractive, slightly inebriated individual. As copulation is most commonly achieved when two individuals are slightly inebriated and mutually attractive, it seems most logical that such an event would occur between us.

Objection 2: It is scientifically noted that when a male sees a person to which he is attracted, the flow of blood in his body switches to a downward circulation. Upon considering our joining sexually, my blood responded thus.

Objection 3: It is noted that regular sexual release is healthy for a human adult, thus by choosing to achieve this end, we are assuring our good health.

On the contrary: You are a human and possessing of free will, and should your body to respond in a corresponding manner to mine, it is most unethical to attempt sexual intercourse with an unwilling party.

I answer that, as you have not thrown your drink in my face, you may perhaps be interested in my suit, and I have stipulated why I am interested in you. Barring your refusal, copulation should proceed posthaste.

Reply to Objection 1: Your refusal indicates that while you may be slightly inebriated, it is not enough to find me attractive if, indeed, you ever found me attractive at all.

Reply to Objection 2: Though a male may experience a fire in his loins at the sight of an attractive individual, it is possible to quench such a fire by participating in a mental exercise of imagining something unpleasant, or perhaps by satisfying the urge of his own actions.

Reply to Objection 3: Should a male achieve release upon his own person, the presence of another is therefore nullified.


AND IT GOES ON LIKE THAT FOR TWENTY PAGES ON IF THERE IS MORALITY IN LAW OR BLAH BLAH BLAH AND FUCK THOMAS AQUINAS, I DON'T GIVE A SHIT. I keep falling asleep instead of finishing.

Things I do give a shit about, though! MERLIN. MERLIN THIS WEEK OH MY FUCK.

MY THOUGHTS ON THIS WEEK'S MERLIN THAT REALLY DIDN'T WANT TO BE MARSHALED INTO COLUMN FORM AND IT WAS FRUSTRATING. )
chibirhm: (This charming man.)
REJECTION LETTERS TO PEOPLE WHO SPAM MY INBOX


Dear Christian Coalition of America,

How the fuck did you even get my e-mail? Seriously? I'm Jewish. Here, let me break this down for you. You: Jesus. Me: No Jesus. You: Multiple testaments. Me: Keeping it old-school. Also, I eat babies and control the media you don't, but for obvious PR reasons my people like to keep that on the down-low.

In conclusion, stop mailing me.

Love, Me


Dear MoveOn.Org,

In theory, things should work between us. You're a bunch of socialist hippies, I'm a socialist hippie, we have a lot in common. But I think of you like my socially awkward cousin that I may be ideologically related to, but totally don't want to admit that we're related in public. I know I gave you my e-mail, but that was only to get that awesomesauce Obama sticker you were offering for free if I did so. I have un-subscribed from your mailing list about ten times. STOP CALLING ME.

Love, Me


Dear President Obama,

I promise I'm voting Democratic this election season. Seriously. I still love you. You're still beautiful just the way you are. You're just getting a little desperate.

Love, Me.


Dear USY,

Why do you still e-mail me? I went to one of your events six years ago because my mom made me. I hated it then, and I still don't want to go to your events now. Especially since I am about four years too old to do so. And I certainly don't want to donate anything to Israel. Do you want to hear my thoughts on Israel? Will that get me kicked out of you enough for you to STOP E-MAILING ME? Because I'll do it.

Love, Me.

---


And now, our weekly dose of Colin and Bradley, dumbfaces in love. )
chibirhm: (JGL is my future husband)
Happy Sunday morning, everyone! Were you using that spot next to you? No? Good, because here is my brain, and I'm going to dump it RIIIIIGHT there.

MY IMPORTANT THOUGHTS ON MUSIC AND FANFICTION

So I totally hated Ellie Goulding based on Starry-Eyed and was like WHATEVER, but then I heard this song in some fanvid that honesty I don't even remember anymore:



J'ADORE. It's such a perfect Arthur/Eames song (or really any ship in Inception, let's not lie) and goes with a fic idea I've been wanting to write for them, but I'm sort of flailing on how to even start, because like all my ideas it's all ~epic relationship exploration~ instead of just a nice, 5K bit of fluff or porn like everyone probably would prefer. Also, I have this random idea that I also want to have a companion piece from Yusuf's point of view, which would require a LOT of research because my knowledge of chemistry/Kenya/Yusuf's ethnicity (he's Muslim, I think? I think someone referred to him as "Desi"? I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS, GUYS. I mean, I know there are Muslims in that part of Africa because of trade and I paid attention in ninth grade history, but therein ends my knowledge) is pretty nil. Also I really want to finish that Merlin/Inception mashup I started for [livejournal.com profile] cherrybina's necking meme ages ago, only it seems it's going to have zero necking in it, because I defy authority or some shit. Also, it went and decided it needed to develop a plot, but I have no fucking clue what the plot is supposed to be. AUGH MY LIFE.

Also, I feel sort of bad because so many people are like OH NO PEOPLE ARE LEAVING MERLIN FOR INCEPTION and blah blah JEALOUSY. And honestly, I'm not. I've also got a Sherlock fic I outlined before realizing there simply was not enough source material in three episodes to write it. It'll probably get filled in once they actually make more episodes. I actually do have a lot of ideas for Merlin fic, but I've found I hate writing during the season, because inevitably the next episode will air and totally ruin everything I've written and it DRIVES ME CRAZY. I'd prefer not to finish anything until the season is over, thank you, and instead twiddle my thumbs finishing Inception fics because new canon won't keep being added for the sole purpose of MAKING ME CRY.

In conclusion, yesterday [livejournal.com profile] franticsga noticed that Merlin and Ariadne are sartorial soulmates, and then I made some demands, and now I really want them filled. I'm maybe a little sad no one filled my Silly Bands prompt.

BLAH BLAH MORE THOUGHTS. Including but not limited to - porn, Bradley James as a superhero, Katy Perry's boobs, my thoughts on parenting, and more! Oh, wheeee. )
chibirhm: (Yes we did.)
My election day in ridiculous, pictoral depth. )

Edit: So obviously, Not everything went well this election. I mean, I'm cool with everything, really, except the gay marriage bans (and gay adoption ban, what the fuck Arkansas? Incest is legal in your state but HEAVEN FORBID gay people adopt a child? Fuck you.) The only reasons I'm not totally livid is because a) I don't live in those states and can't do anything about it, b) I am trying to be understanding, here (and if you are having issues, I suggest you read this) and c) at least in California, it's legality is already being challenged. Plus, Ah-nuld was really against it and said if it came across his desk he'd veto it. So yeah, for once, I'm glad that the government is ignoring the people. When it comes to granting civil rights, I'd like them to please ignore the crazy people more often. Thanks.
chibirhm: (My clandestine lover the semi-colon)
Before We Get Started; Compiler's Notes (aka, you may scroll past these, I will not hold it against you)

(ALSO, BEWARE OF VERY VAGUE SPOILERS, IF YOU ARE STUPID ENOUGH TO GO ON THE INTERNET AND READ THIS WITHOUT READING DEATHLY HALLOWS):

So a caveat on this mix - I have never compiled a soundtrack so fast in my entire life. If you've never met me during the process of making a mix, I agonize over it. I literally have a Brokeback Mountain mix sitting on my computer that hasn't changed in years, but I cannot post it because, in my gut, it is not right. And I can't explain it. I am extremely meticulous and compulsive with my mixes. It usually shows. I also, usually, am extremely snobby when it comes to music as far as a mix goes. For me it's not enough for some of the lyrics to make sense, most of the lyrics must make sense. And on top of that, it must be the right sound. You would, not, for instance, make a Rainbow Brite soundtrack with Metallica. Even if the lyrics were perfect. It just doesn't work like that. Normally my test is "Would the characters listen to this? If yes, good, if not, delete it."

This mix has, against all odds, birthed itself whole and wailing to be posted. Remus Lupin would probably listen to two of these songs, if he listened to muggle music at all. It follows almost none of the golden rules I have made for myself in regards to a finished fanmix, and yet, [livejournal.com profile] fanmix was having a theme contest and I just couldn't resist. Though I did wait until the very last minute to post it. Duh. Instead of my usual method, I chose songs based on creating a mood, not based on the character. I wanted a mix that made perfect lyrical sense but had a very old, nostalgic, bittersweet, sort of faded yellow-and-scarlet feel to them. I wanted them to sound dusty and heartbroken and woodsy and sad, which naturally translated into "sensitive indie people on guitars". Which, yeah, okay, wasn't that much of a stretch for me. Anyways, while this is labeled a Remus mix, it very much has an implied "...and Sirius" bent to it. It is not by accident that a lot of these songs give a sense of "I'm with someone else and you're gone but that doesn't mean I don't still love you mostest." Because that's how I read the books. It just is. And don't ask me to explain the last song - the lyrics, to me, are like "omg yay happy puppies in the afterlife!", except I realize that it's totally just me. WHATEVER.

In conclusion, this mix is dedicated entirely to [livejournal.com profile] missmary for cajoling, encouraging, beating, suggesting music, and mostly being awesome me while I was agonizing. Everything remotely good about this mix is her doing. Everything bad about this mix is entirely my fault. True story.

Also, I know the moon kind of goes the other direction. Call it artistic lisence. Or come up with some deep meaning like about the backwardness of Lupin's life in relation to the moon. It'll earn you bonus points in life.


And The Dead Are All Living - A Mix For Remus Lupin During the Second War )
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